Sunday, February 10, 2013
I Shall Not Be Moved!
Today has been a really rough day emotionally. There have been a lot of emotionally difficult days lately. Why?
Life is generally pretty good.
My husband loves me dearly and takes such good care of me.
I have two beautiful children who, for the most part, are very well behaved. I am blessed to be able to homeschool them.
I have an abundance of great Christian friends.
We belong to a wonderful Bible believing church where we share sweet fellowship with other believers.
I have great parents, lots of siblings.
What could possibly be wrong in this life?
Nothing visible from the outside. It's all hidden. Most of the time it's hidden from everyone. Sometimes I will be slightly honest when asked by a friend at church how I'm doing; but generally I figure, who wants to be dumped on right before service starts when they walk up and say "Hi! How are you?", with every intention to walk away and speak to the next person they see. :)
There are often times that I am on the verge of tears and just put on my happy church face. Some days like today, I stay hidden away in the bathroom until I have the tears under control. The tears usually begin to trickle out during the worship music at the beginning of service. When I find myself really worshiping from my heart and surrendering everything hidden inside, I feel such relief. There are many times that God uses someone at church to let me know how much He loves me. I have felt God's touch through the arms of various ladies at my church who have hugged me and told me they love me. I am truly blessed to be a part of Calvary Fellowship.
I pray every Sunday that God will use me to be a blessing to someone at church because there have been so many times that I have been blessed by others.
So back to this junk hidden inside. There's fear, worry, frustration, anger, disappointments, jealousy. You name it...it's probably in there. There has been a pattern over the last few years; this time of year tends to be a time for me to battle with depression. Certainly not as serious as some have dealt with, but it's there. I have to try to remember that, for me, my first weapon in this battle is serious prayer time and time spent studying my Bible. The second weapon is exercise. In this battle with depression, all this junk hidden inside are like a million arrows being shot at me from every side of my mind. Every thought is connected to another in this mass of spaghetti brain I have. It is all intertwined and just one worry or outburst of anger triggers all of it to pile up, overwhelming my mind in a very short amount of time and bringing me to my bed in tears with no desire to get up and take care of anything.
For several weeks now things have been getting worse and worse in my head. Less and less has been getting done around the house. More and more I just want to stay home and do nothing. I have been aware of it building and keep telling myself to get a grip before it gets worse.
If I could quit my "job" as mom....today would have been my last day! There have been more and more difficult days on this job lately. I do not feel I am doing my best dealing with the changing attitudes, behavior, and emotions of an "almost 12 yr old" boy. This is the source of much of my anger, frustration and fear. I have been doubting so much lately about my ability to train and teach my children. What if I really mess them up? This has been nagging at me so often. When I see my son's outbursts of anger and it's like watching myself...How disturbing!
I am aware that as a Christian, there is an enemy that wants me to doubt and fear and fail. But he will not win this battle! Today after a short nap, many tears, much yelling, and a lot of time spent just staring out the window ignoring God's nudging to get up and do something....I finally got up. I put my shoes on, starting pumping music into my ears and walked on my treadmill for a while. After a bit of exercise I began to feel better. I went outside to cool down and sat staring at the sky singing and praying. My prayer was simply,"God, I really need you. I need you so much." That's all I could come up with. That was my heart's cry and apparently it was good enough for Him. Just at that moment He came to me physically....through my sweet daughter. Alahna came out and sat beside me. All of a sudden she said, "Mom! Look up there!" I looked up to see a jet in the sky. She then said "It's flying away, just like we will some day when we go to Jesus." I started crying again and she reached up to wipe my tears, held my hand and then hugged me. WOW!! I love when God uses someone so precious to me to let me feel Him near.
There are some people in this world who do not believe that God exists, but I KNOW He is there, because I have felt Him, heard Him, and seen Him move and work in my life countless times. Today was just another stone laid in the foundation that my life is built on. Each struggle that Jesus sees me through just makes my roots grow that much deeper in my faith. I pray that I will continue to grow and be as the old song says,"Just like a tree that's planted by the water, I shall not be moved." May my life always be "anchored in Jehovah".
I am thankful that I have the assurance of my Salvation through Jesus. I am ever grateful that though I am often unfaithful and doubting, He is always faithful and reassuring me of His great love for me.
Tuesday, September 4, 2012
Late night thoughts...
Once again I am thinking that I am so blessed. My kids and I had a fun and interesting Bible time tonight. We read about Gideon, then tried to see how many Scripture verses we could recite from memory. Loved that the kids were arguing over who got to say the next verse. Alahna began to recite Psalm 23 and David tried to tell her it had to be single verses! LOL
I was amazed at some of the verses David knew from Bible Sword Drill. Some of the verses he recited were verses that he just had to memorize the scripture reference, but because they had looked them up and read them SO many times, he had the whole verses memorized. :)
We somehow got in a discussion about Heaven, and David told me that when he pictures Heaven, he pictures himself sitting on God's lap! How incredible!!
In our discussion of Heaven, he asked if I thought Adalai would have a grown up body. :) He said he wants to see her grown up. Then...Alahna began to ask how Adalai got out of my belly and if we buried her! LOL UGH!! I dodged around those questions pretty good. Told her we will talk about that later! She thought it was because it would make me cry! haha Not quite!! (Adalai is our 2nd baby that died at 8 weeks gestation, just a few days after I saw her heartbeat for the first time. It was one year before Alahna was born. David was 3 yr old at the time and insisted the baby was a girl, so that's how we refer to her. Both kids occasionally like to tell people they have a sister in Heaven!)
I am in awe again tonight at Alahna's tender heart. (Although there are moments when that tender heart is quite hidden!) Almost every day for the past week she keeps talking about Aunt Toni Lay and ends up in tears. A few days ago she was crying and I asked her what she was thinking that made her cry and if there was something that was making her afraid. Her response surprised me, but then her explanation was even more surprising. She said she was crying because she was worried about Grandma. I immediately thought it was because she (Alahna) was in the room with us a month ago when the ER doctor scared us by incorrectly informing us that Mom had cancer.(She does NOT.) Alahna has lost 2 very special people to death this year and is acquainted with others who are currently battling cancer. BUT...her explanation was this: "Mommy, I am worried about Grandma because Aunt Toni was her sister and I just don't want her to be sad and miss her." I pray that as she grows up she will always feel that pain for others and is able to pray for them and minister in whatever way God leads her.
If I tell her about people from church who are sick, she remembers to pray for them.
On Sunday, an older man at our church had a stroke after the morning service and she remembered the next day to pray for him and his family. Tonight, when it was time to pray, I told the kids that Bro. Johnny is now in Heaven, and she made sure she prayed for his family. Shortly after talking about him going to Heaven, she began again to feel sad about Aunt Toni. She said, "Mommy, why did Aunt Toni have to leave us?" I am so thankful for the hope we have in Jesus at moments like that. It is then that I can assure her that as long as we stay faithful in following Jesus, we will see her in Heaven someday.
Aunt Toni probably never knew the impact she had in Alahna's life. We, too, may never know the impact we are having in the lives of those around us. We must be diligent to live a life that leaves a positive impact and an eternal impact. Only the work that we do for God will last for eternity - Showing His love, being His hands and feet, sharing the Gospel (good news) of Jesus. Although we are required to "do good", on the day we stand before God, he will not check to see if our "good" outweighs our "bad". He will look to see if our name is written in the Lamb's Book of Life. Only those who have asked Jesus to be their Savior and followed him to the end of their life will be found in that Book. He is the ONLY way to the Father.
Other thoughts for tonight....
I love teaching! I am enjoying getting to teach our Wednesday night kids' class at church. I love the kids. I love to teach them truths from the Bible and help them learn how to apply those truths to their lives.
I love learning! I am studying about Ancient Greece in order to teach a class at our homeschool group beginning this Friday. David wanted to learn about it, so I am going to teach it as I learn it! So far it is fascinating! I love history and I love to see how the people and Bible stories I have heard and loved all my life fit into the timeline of ancient history.
I love life. So many roles I play - wife, mom, daughter, sister, friend, teacher....but the one that brings the greatest joy is being a child of God. I could not fulfill any of the other roles in my life to the fullest without the grace that is given to me every day. I would not have the strength or even the love needed, without Jesus. I truly am nothing without Him. I have tried to live without the Holy Spirit leading, and I have ended up hurting people I loved. Sometimes life gets hard, but God is always good. Even when I am not good, He is. God is the source of any good in my life. He is my source of joy and peace.
Whether it's a still small voice, a familiar Scripture, a hug from a friend, a timely text or phone call, the arms of my husband, or the sweet concern of a child, God continually shows Himself to me and works in my life.
So...."How can I keep from singing your praise? How can I ever say enough, How amazing is your love! How can I keep from shouting your name? I know I am loved by the King, and it makes my heart want to sing." (an amazing song by Chris Tomlin)
I think I can sleep now. Well, after I sing that song a little more. :)
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
Thankful for these magnificent little moments!
Some magnificent little moments of this evening....
* playing pretend with Alahna while working together in the kitchen. She knocks on the wall by the kitchen doorway, and I have to invite her in. We both have different names(she assigned me the name Joy and she chose the name Sue) and she pretends to be a grown up friend coming over to visit. We talk about our kids and husbands. (My husband & kids keep their real names!) LOL It is so much fun! Tonight I had to set her straight though...she said she had been married for 3 years and a few minutes later told me her son was 10 yrs old. I told her the number for her kid had to be smaller than the number for her marriage!! LOL She had 3 kids this time - Katy, Alexander and Grace. When we get finished she says "well, I need to go now" and then suddenly my daughter arrives. :) I always say lots of good things about "my kids" and talk about how wonderful my "husband" is.
* playing badminton with hubby & Alahna in the backyard.
* catching lightning bugs with hubby & Alahna, then watching them walk hand in hand up to the house.
* Helping Alahna build a fort in our room to sleep in tonight.
I am blessed beyond measure! SO undeservedly. Thank you, Father God for your blessings.
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Love You Forever
Tonight as I was going into Alahna's room to pray with her and tuck her in, I decided I would hold her and sing to her before she gets too big for me to do that anymore. I had to crawl under her jump rope that is tied from the posts at the head and foot of her bed. LOL She is sleeping under a tent that she made with a blanket and her rope. I sang a couple little songs...one that is just her name sung to a tune that I adopted for that purpose and another that is the same tune but words I sing to her about how we love her. She has always loved that. I did the same for David when he was little. Then I sang "Masterpiece" by Sandi Patti.
"I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always. As long as I'm living my mommy you'll be."
Well, I told all that to tell this....as I sang that chorus to my quickly growing, almost 11 year old boy, he began to sing with me. As our choruses neared the end, and he sang his part while I sang mine, the tears started to fall. I held him so very tightly and he held me.
Then we prayed and I tearfully thanked God for allowing me to be that precious little boy's mom. That was followed by his prayer thanking God for giving him such an awesome mom. What a gift!
I don't have photos or video of these moments, but I will never need them. These moments will forever be engraved in my heart and my mind. Precious moments of precious children. Gifts from God.
Their lives truly are a masterpiece that only God could create. I am blessed to be a part of their lives.
| Lyrics: |
| Before you had a name or opened up your eyes Or anyone could recognize your face. You were being formed so delicate in size Secluded in God's safe and hidden place. With your little tiny hands and little tiny feet And little eyes that shimmer like a pearl He breathed in you a song and to make it all complete He brought the masterpiece into the world. You are a masterpiece A new creation He has formed And you're as soft and fresh as a snowy winter morn. And I'm so glad that God has given you to me Little Lamb of God, you are a masterpiece. And now you're growing up your life's a miracle Everytime I look at you I stand in awe Because I see in you a reflection of me And you'll always be my little lamb from God And as your life goes on each day How I pray that you will see Just how much your life has meant to me. And I'm so proud of you What else is there to say? Just be the masterpiece He created you to be. David sang that song with me at Alahna's baby dedication. I have sung it to both kids since they were itty bitty. After some time with my precious girl, I went to David's room. I had already decided that I would do nearly the same for him. I knew I couldn't hold him on my lap, but we snuggled and I sang to him after a lengthy conversation. I sang "Masterpiece" to him and then I decided I would sing one more little chorus to him. Almost 11 years ago at my baby shower, my dear, sweet friend Trish gave me a book entitled "Love You Forever". If you have never read this book, you really must read it sometime, but make sure you have a box of tissues handy! I was told I had to read this book at my baby shower in front of everyone while I was 8 months pregnant and extremely emotional! Some friend, huh! LOL ;) Just kidding! I have treasured this book and read it to David over the years. It is very special to both of us. It is a short story of a young mother who rocks her baby and sings a little chorus that says, "I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always. As long as I'm living my baby you'll be." Throughout the book there are humorous situations depicted that occur over the years as her son grows. As the years pass, she continues to go into his room at night and pick him and rock him while singing the chorus, "I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always. As long as I'm living my baby you'll be." I won't give away the whole story, but at one point of the book, the son sings to his mother, |
Well, I told all that to tell this....as I sang that chorus to my quickly growing, almost 11 year old boy, he began to sing with me. As our choruses neared the end, and he sang his part while I sang mine, the tears started to fall. I held him so very tightly and he held me.
Then we prayed and I tearfully thanked God for allowing me to be that precious little boy's mom. That was followed by his prayer thanking God for giving him such an awesome mom. What a gift!
I don't have photos or video of these moments, but I will never need them. These moments will forever be engraved in my heart and my mind. Precious moments of precious children. Gifts from God.
Their lives truly are a masterpiece that only God could create. I am blessed to be a part of their lives.
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Random thoughts: growing older, kids, holidays, blessings
Here we are. First day of a brand new year.
It's so weird to realize it's the year 2012. I remember having conversations with my sisters when we were little about how old we would be when the year 2000 came. We would talk about how odd it seemed to think of someday being 30something years old. Now my oldest sister is almost 2 yrs past that decade, my next oldest sister is leaving her 30's behind in just 10 days, and I have only 2 1/2 years left in my 30's! WOW!!! Our parents are now the age our grandparents were when we were kids.
Our kids....well....they are growing up so quickly. Michael and I occasionally tease David about little girls he knows. He is wanting to do everything "grown up". He has started showering every day. He's wearing cologne. These are "Milestones" along our way. He talks about getting a job some day and he can't wait to learn how to drive. David will be 11 in April. Seems like just yesterday I was taking a pregnancy test at 5 am and telling Michael it was positive. We were both in awe that we were actually going to have our own child.
This past year of 2011 has been a year of progress for David. He has grown and matured. He has had many struggles and still has many to face. I am confident that he will grow into a strong young man who knows what he believes. He is a wonderful caregiver when others in our family are sick or hurting. He plays so well with his little sister. Just a few days ago I took the kids to the park. Within just a moment of reaching the playground, Alahna had made a new friend. It took only another moment before David had been designated the "monster" and proceeded to act the part, chasing Alahna and her new friend all over the playground.
I had another "milestone moment" when David crawled through a tunnel, came out and said "Mom, I don't fit in those tunnels like I used to." We just keep reaching milestone after milestone so quickly these days. So many signs of my little boy reaching adolescence.
We have experienced spiritual battles, resulting in spiritual growth. He loves to read his new Action Bible. It tells the Bible through comic book pictures. There are many days that he reminds me to sit and have our Bible time together. He has experienced the effect it has on our days. One of my favorite precious moments recently was when David was praying at bedtime and said, "Thank you for giving me such an awesome mom." Doesn't get much better than that!!
Alahna is changing every day it seems. Some days she is such a little lady, and others she is a tomboy through and through. Alahna is definitely her daddy's little work buddy. If Michael is in the garage or outside working, no matter that weather, she is right there with him. She is so competitive. Anything David can do, she tries to out-do him. If there is a dead bug on the floor and we tell David to get rid of it, he usually hesitates....and she says, "I'll get it." Just today the kids found a dead baby mouse on our side porch. Alahna was the one to put gloves on and throw it in the woods. :) She is always riding her bike and trying to do little stunts. Shouldn't be long before we have our first trip to the ER. LOL
Alahna has a caring servant's heart just like her brother. If anyone in the house is not feeling well, she is right there to take care of them. She can tell when I am about to cry and it brings her to tears. Even at church, after the kids' Christmas program, our pastor's wife was beginning to cry as she spoke to the families about how proud she was of the children, and Alahna along with another child began to tear up. I love that their hearts are so soft and caring that they can feel another person's emotions.
I will often tell David and Alahna of people who are sick that we need to pray for. When we pray at bedtime, they remember to pray for them. Just a few days ago, I told Alahna about a text I received that had bad news about someone we have been praying for. Her reply was, "Mom, text her back and tell her I'm sorry." I made sure I did.
This past year was a busy year. It was not our best year, but definitely not our worst. Regardless of how our days went, we were blessed. God was still God. Faithful, Good, Loving. Always carrying us through days we couldn't make it on our own.
My last couple posts were made during a definite turning point for me this year. Spiritual battles definitely result in growth when God is allowed to have His way in our lives.
Since that time, I have seen God working in my life and in the lives of my children.
Our holiday season was so very enjoyable. Right before Thanksgiving we celebrated Alahna's 6th birthday and my little sister Ronni's 18th birthday. Thanksgiving was a delight because my big sis Joyful and her family were home from NY. We had a great time visiting while they were home. The following weekend we celebrated my brother-in-law Rob's 40th birthday in Columbia and visited with he & Lisa and their 10 children. That was a great time!
Two weeks later we celebrated Christmas with my Dad and step-mom Sharon. This was a bit different this year because Joy and Darin were not here. (A fact that caused quite a bit of struggle for me throughout the days leading up to Christmas.) The day turned out to be one I will never ever forget. My dad sat in David's room with him and spent time showing him some things about the guitar. He then played and sang a song for the kids and me that he wrote himself. I was crying by the time he finished. Just watching him there with my kids, sharing that time with them, was such a blessing. The message of the song was awesome as well! I never knew any of my grandparents very well at all. I definitely never had any special moments as a child with them like my kids have had with their grandparents. My kids have had lots of time with my mom and Michael's parents, but not much time with my dad. So this was extra special. He and Sharon then played Kinect games with David and Alahna. Now that was fun and very memorable!
Last weekend we were blessed yet again to share much family time with our loved ones over the Christmas weekend. Time with Michael's family, my mom and siblings and even a couple hours with my mom's side of the family. Many uncles, aunts and cousins, lots of pictures, and Mom's homemade fudge made for a fun evening!
Now...here we are...time to get back on a decent diet of something other than baked goods and candy. Bedtimes back to some what of a normal time...anything before 10pm would be good to start! Waking times back to 7am instead of 10am!!
I am looking forward to seeing what God will do in our family this year. Sometimes I actually feel a little fear that because things have been going so well, surely something bad has to happen. But I refuse to worry. I want to enjoy every day that God blesses me with those I love the most. My prayer has been and continues to be "Lord, help me to bless your name in the difficult times as well as the easy times."
Blessed be your name
In the land that is plentiful
Where the streams of abundance flow
Blessed be your name
Blessed be your name
When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed be your name
It's so weird to realize it's the year 2012. I remember having conversations with my sisters when we were little about how old we would be when the year 2000 came. We would talk about how odd it seemed to think of someday being 30something years old. Now my oldest sister is almost 2 yrs past that decade, my next oldest sister is leaving her 30's behind in just 10 days, and I have only 2 1/2 years left in my 30's! WOW!!! Our parents are now the age our grandparents were when we were kids.
Our kids....well....they are growing up so quickly. Michael and I occasionally tease David about little girls he knows. He is wanting to do everything "grown up". He has started showering every day. He's wearing cologne. These are "Milestones" along our way. He talks about getting a job some day and he can't wait to learn how to drive. David will be 11 in April. Seems like just yesterday I was taking a pregnancy test at 5 am and telling Michael it was positive. We were both in awe that we were actually going to have our own child.
This past year of 2011 has been a year of progress for David. He has grown and matured. He has had many struggles and still has many to face. I am confident that he will grow into a strong young man who knows what he believes. He is a wonderful caregiver when others in our family are sick or hurting. He plays so well with his little sister. Just a few days ago I took the kids to the park. Within just a moment of reaching the playground, Alahna had made a new friend. It took only another moment before David had been designated the "monster" and proceeded to act the part, chasing Alahna and her new friend all over the playground.
I had another "milestone moment" when David crawled through a tunnel, came out and said "Mom, I don't fit in those tunnels like I used to." We just keep reaching milestone after milestone so quickly these days. So many signs of my little boy reaching adolescence.
We have experienced spiritual battles, resulting in spiritual growth. He loves to read his new Action Bible. It tells the Bible through comic book pictures. There are many days that he reminds me to sit and have our Bible time together. He has experienced the effect it has on our days. One of my favorite precious moments recently was when David was praying at bedtime and said, "Thank you for giving me such an awesome mom." Doesn't get much better than that!!
Alahna is changing every day it seems. Some days she is such a little lady, and others she is a tomboy through and through. Alahna is definitely her daddy's little work buddy. If Michael is in the garage or outside working, no matter that weather, she is right there with him. She is so competitive. Anything David can do, she tries to out-do him. If there is a dead bug on the floor and we tell David to get rid of it, he usually hesitates....and she says, "I'll get it." Just today the kids found a dead baby mouse on our side porch. Alahna was the one to put gloves on and throw it in the woods. :) She is always riding her bike and trying to do little stunts. Shouldn't be long before we have our first trip to the ER. LOL
Alahna has a caring servant's heart just like her brother. If anyone in the house is not feeling well, she is right there to take care of them. She can tell when I am about to cry and it brings her to tears. Even at church, after the kids' Christmas program, our pastor's wife was beginning to cry as she spoke to the families about how proud she was of the children, and Alahna along with another child began to tear up. I love that their hearts are so soft and caring that they can feel another person's emotions.
I will often tell David and Alahna of people who are sick that we need to pray for. When we pray at bedtime, they remember to pray for them. Just a few days ago, I told Alahna about a text I received that had bad news about someone we have been praying for. Her reply was, "Mom, text her back and tell her I'm sorry." I made sure I did.
This past year was a busy year. It was not our best year, but definitely not our worst. Regardless of how our days went, we were blessed. God was still God. Faithful, Good, Loving. Always carrying us through days we couldn't make it on our own.
My last couple posts were made during a definite turning point for me this year. Spiritual battles definitely result in growth when God is allowed to have His way in our lives.
Since that time, I have seen God working in my life and in the lives of my children.
Our holiday season was so very enjoyable. Right before Thanksgiving we celebrated Alahna's 6th birthday and my little sister Ronni's 18th birthday. Thanksgiving was a delight because my big sis Joyful and her family were home from NY. We had a great time visiting while they were home. The following weekend we celebrated my brother-in-law Rob's 40th birthday in Columbia and visited with he & Lisa and their 10 children. That was a great time!
Two weeks later we celebrated Christmas with my Dad and step-mom Sharon. This was a bit different this year because Joy and Darin were not here. (A fact that caused quite a bit of struggle for me throughout the days leading up to Christmas.) The day turned out to be one I will never ever forget. My dad sat in David's room with him and spent time showing him some things about the guitar. He then played and sang a song for the kids and me that he wrote himself. I was crying by the time he finished. Just watching him there with my kids, sharing that time with them, was such a blessing. The message of the song was awesome as well! I never knew any of my grandparents very well at all. I definitely never had any special moments as a child with them like my kids have had with their grandparents. My kids have had lots of time with my mom and Michael's parents, but not much time with my dad. So this was extra special. He and Sharon then played Kinect games with David and Alahna. Now that was fun and very memorable!
Last weekend we were blessed yet again to share much family time with our loved ones over the Christmas weekend. Time with Michael's family, my mom and siblings and even a couple hours with my mom's side of the family. Many uncles, aunts and cousins, lots of pictures, and Mom's homemade fudge made for a fun evening!
Now...here we are...time to get back on a decent diet of something other than baked goods and candy. Bedtimes back to some what of a normal time...anything before 10pm would be good to start! Waking times back to 7am instead of 10am!!
I am looking forward to seeing what God will do in our family this year. Sometimes I actually feel a little fear that because things have been going so well, surely something bad has to happen. But I refuse to worry. I want to enjoy every day that God blesses me with those I love the most. My prayer has been and continues to be "Lord, help me to bless your name in the difficult times as well as the easy times."
Blessed be your name
In the land that is plentiful
Where the streams of abundance flow
Blessed be your name
Blessed be your name
When I'm found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed be your name
So as this day comes to a close, I say again, I am blessed beyond measure....All because of Jesus.
Monday, August 22, 2011
Surrendered and Full of JOY!
Well, I thought I would go ahead and post an update for those who care to read.
I woke up this morning and my first thought was, "I need to go delete that blog post." I couldn't believe I had posted such negative thoughts for others to read. Yet, I thought that perhaps it might just help someone. I have read of others' struggles and it has actually encouraged me to know that others were just as frail as I. So....I left it.
When I awoke, I was filled with a strong desire to pray and spend some time with the Lord. I knelt beside my bed and just talked to Him. It was such a sweet time. I found myself with a song in my heart, and picked up a hymn book to find the song that was in my heart. Then I began to just sing. Each page I turned had another song that fit exactly what I needed this morning.
Earlier today I told someone very close to me that I refuse to doubt what I know to be true. Just as sure as I know the sky is blue because I've seen it; and a baby's skin is soft because I've felt it; I KNOW that God is present with me in my life. I know that He is faithful and true. I know that He will never leave me or forsake me. I know He has a plan for my life. I know that I am HIS! I know this because I have seen Him work in my life. I have felt His divine presence. I have seen and felt His power and peace. Nothing in this world can compare to the peace that I feel when I am trusting Jesus.
Regardless of who is with me on this pilgrimage, I will follow Jesus. Everywhere He leads me, I will follow on.
I will have difficult days and the struggles I face will not just disappear, but I don't have to carry the burden alone. When days like yesterday come, I can recognize what it is. It is such a mix of physical, emotional and spiritual chaos. And yesterday didn't just pop up out of the blue. The struggle I had yesterday had been building for several days. But I was weak and unprepared for battle. Even though I had seen it coming...I was still unprepared.
I am so grateful for the prayers that were lifted up for me. Thank you! I felt them. Sometimes I am just awed at the power of prayer. Interceding for others, lifting them up when they are weak, is such an incredible ministry. Helping a fellow pilgrim fight the enemy and press on in this journey is what we are called to do. God sends help just when we need it. I have witnessed this over and over again in my life and the lives of those around me.
It is this evidence of God that convinces me to keep pressing on. True joy comes to me and fills my heart when I am completely surrendered to Jesus. This is where I want to stay.
He truly does give his servants rest. There is fulness of joy in His presence.
I woke up this morning and my first thought was, "I need to go delete that blog post." I couldn't believe I had posted such negative thoughts for others to read. Yet, I thought that perhaps it might just help someone. I have read of others' struggles and it has actually encouraged me to know that others were just as frail as I. So....I left it.
When I awoke, I was filled with a strong desire to pray and spend some time with the Lord. I knelt beside my bed and just talked to Him. It was such a sweet time. I found myself with a song in my heart, and picked up a hymn book to find the song that was in my heart. Then I began to just sing. Each page I turned had another song that fit exactly what I needed this morning.
Earlier today I told someone very close to me that I refuse to doubt what I know to be true. Just as sure as I know the sky is blue because I've seen it; and a baby's skin is soft because I've felt it; I KNOW that God is present with me in my life. I know that He is faithful and true. I know that He will never leave me or forsake me. I know He has a plan for my life. I know that I am HIS! I know this because I have seen Him work in my life. I have felt His divine presence. I have seen and felt His power and peace. Nothing in this world can compare to the peace that I feel when I am trusting Jesus.
Regardless of who is with me on this pilgrimage, I will follow Jesus. Everywhere He leads me, I will follow on.
I will have difficult days and the struggles I face will not just disappear, but I don't have to carry the burden alone. When days like yesterday come, I can recognize what it is. It is such a mix of physical, emotional and spiritual chaos. And yesterday didn't just pop up out of the blue. The struggle I had yesterday had been building for several days. But I was weak and unprepared for battle. Even though I had seen it coming...I was still unprepared.
I am so grateful for the prayers that were lifted up for me. Thank you! I felt them. Sometimes I am just awed at the power of prayer. Interceding for others, lifting them up when they are weak, is such an incredible ministry. Helping a fellow pilgrim fight the enemy and press on in this journey is what we are called to do. God sends help just when we need it. I have witnessed this over and over again in my life and the lives of those around me.
It is this evidence of God that convinces me to keep pressing on. True joy comes to me and fills my heart when I am completely surrendered to Jesus. This is where I want to stay.
He truly does give his servants rest. There is fulness of joy in His presence.
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Weary Pilgrim...Stumbling Soldier
WARNING: This blog post contains content unlike my usual posts. It is me being open and honest about the real me. Continue on at your own risk.
Some days and weeks are just full of spiritual battles....and quite honestly, today I am just really sick of trying to fight. Today has been mix of really bad and really good. It started really bad, got better and then this evening pretty much just stinks again. I know that others are fighting battles that seem so much more intense and are literally life threatening....but each battle faced is real and gets very tiresome.
I cannot post on here all that I am dealing with, but for anyone who reads this and cares to pray for me....I could really use the spiritual support. This pilgrim is just frustrated and confused. I am battling the demons of doubt and fear, and I don't want them to win. My armor feels like it has taken a beating and needs some repair. Or maybe I'm just not wearing it properly. I know I need to spend some serious time with the King.
I also feel like a soldier who is only willing to fight if someone I love is willing to be in the army with me, and right now that someone doesn't want to commit to joining me. I know that being in this "army" is the right thing to do, but I don't want to fight without this someone.
I am finding myself wanting to pull away from church and all things related to the church. Yet at the same time, I want so badly to feel a part of it. (Mind you, I said the church...not God.) I have some spiritual wounds that are need of the healing touch that comes only from the Holy Spirit. Yet I am keeping myself so busy that I haven't taken the time to sit and receive that healing. WHY? Why do I do this? Today I sat and cried out on the church steps instead of sitting in the church service where I could have been a part of the service and been fed. I sat outside and fought demons....more like had the snot beat out of me by them....instead of retreating to the One who could help me. What kept me where I was??? Pride. Plain and simple. I finally did cry out to God....and He helped like He always does. He is always faithful. I got past that part of the path today, but the stretch of road I'm on is still plagued by demons trying to get me to doubt my faith in God. I know I need to fight and I feel stronger than I did earlier today, but I need some other Believing Soldiers to, in prayer, walk this stretch with me.
In case you are reading this and wonder about my "pilgrim" and "soldier" references, I would suggest you read "Little Pilgrim's Progress" by Helen L. Taylor(I know, it's a children's version!) and "The Shining Sword" by Charles G. Coleman. :) Two of my all time favorite books.
I rarely let too many people see this side of me....but here it is. I, too, battle with anger, depression, doubt, fear, etc. Maybe you realize that everyone does....but I don't like to admit that I do. I'd rather keep up the "stained glass masquerade". Though, it hurts to do that for too long; I know from experience. Some times it's good to let others see your weaknesses. I don't plan to do it too often, but just felt I needed to let it show tonight. This "warrior" really is a child who just wants to "lay the sword down and cry for just a while". Sorry, the song references keep coming to mind and they fit well. LOL
Well, I guess that's enough honesty for one night. I'm going to go drop to my knees and pray fervently before sleeping tonight. The joy of the Lord is my strength. I will press on. I know that I can rest peacefully when my trust is in Jehovah. I will hold onto His promises!!
Some days and weeks are just full of spiritual battles....and quite honestly, today I am just really sick of trying to fight. Today has been mix of really bad and really good. It started really bad, got better and then this evening pretty much just stinks again. I know that others are fighting battles that seem so much more intense and are literally life threatening....but each battle faced is real and gets very tiresome.
I cannot post on here all that I am dealing with, but for anyone who reads this and cares to pray for me....I could really use the spiritual support. This pilgrim is just frustrated and confused. I am battling the demons of doubt and fear, and I don't want them to win. My armor feels like it has taken a beating and needs some repair. Or maybe I'm just not wearing it properly. I know I need to spend some serious time with the King.
I also feel like a soldier who is only willing to fight if someone I love is willing to be in the army with me, and right now that someone doesn't want to commit to joining me. I know that being in this "army" is the right thing to do, but I don't want to fight without this someone.
I am finding myself wanting to pull away from church and all things related to the church. Yet at the same time, I want so badly to feel a part of it. (Mind you, I said the church...not God.) I have some spiritual wounds that are need of the healing touch that comes only from the Holy Spirit. Yet I am keeping myself so busy that I haven't taken the time to sit and receive that healing. WHY? Why do I do this? Today I sat and cried out on the church steps instead of sitting in the church service where I could have been a part of the service and been fed. I sat outside and fought demons....more like had the snot beat out of me by them....instead of retreating to the One who could help me. What kept me where I was??? Pride. Plain and simple. I finally did cry out to God....and He helped like He always does. He is always faithful. I got past that part of the path today, but the stretch of road I'm on is still plagued by demons trying to get me to doubt my faith in God. I know I need to fight and I feel stronger than I did earlier today, but I need some other Believing Soldiers to, in prayer, walk this stretch with me.
In case you are reading this and wonder about my "pilgrim" and "soldier" references, I would suggest you read "Little Pilgrim's Progress" by Helen L. Taylor(I know, it's a children's version!) and "The Shining Sword" by Charles G. Coleman. :) Two of my all time favorite books.
I rarely let too many people see this side of me....but here it is. I, too, battle with anger, depression, doubt, fear, etc. Maybe you realize that everyone does....but I don't like to admit that I do. I'd rather keep up the "stained glass masquerade". Though, it hurts to do that for too long; I know from experience. Some times it's good to let others see your weaknesses. I don't plan to do it too often, but just felt I needed to let it show tonight. This "warrior" really is a child who just wants to "lay the sword down and cry for just a while". Sorry, the song references keep coming to mind and they fit well. LOL
Well, I guess that's enough honesty for one night. I'm going to go drop to my knees and pray fervently before sleeping tonight. The joy of the Lord is my strength. I will press on. I know that I can rest peacefully when my trust is in Jehovah. I will hold onto His promises!!
Saturday, July 2, 2011
It's A Miracle......He's Still Working on Me!
It's A Miracle He's Still Working on Me!
Both of those are titles to songs that David has sung for competition. The first is the song he sang this year.
The second is the name of a wonderful song that My sister, Lisa and I sang when we were kids. David sang it last year at competition. It says...
He's still working on me, to make me what I ought to be. It took Him just a week to make the moon and the stars, the sun and Earth and Jupiter and Mars. How loving and patient He must be, He's still working on me.
There really ought to be a sign upon my heart...Don't judge him yet, there's an unfinished part. But I'll be perfect just according to His plan. Fashioned by the Master's loving hand.
In the mirror of His Word, reflections that I see make me wonder why He never gave up on me. But He loves me as I am, and helps me when I pray. Remember He's the potter, I'm the clay.
Sometimes things happen that really stink. Sometimes these "stinky" life happenings occur right in the middle of what starts out to be a really great time. We then struggle with how to respond. In years past, I rarely responded well to the difficult things in life. I have in the past been a very selfish, ugly, and angry person. I can look back and see those times, and I pray that I never go back to those ways.
There are times that in spite of what we really, really want, we need to surrender our desires and our will to accept what God has planned instead of what we have planned. As Christians we are expected to prefer others before ourselves. Thinking of others can be much easier said than done. But it can be done when we are completely surrendered to the Holy Spirit and the will of God. Thankfully God keeps working on us and someday He will complete the work that He has begun.
For the last several months, I have worked with David on a song for him to sing at the FWB MO State Youth Competition on June 5. I spent many many hours learning to play a song that was way out of my comfort zone of playing so he could compete. He spent much time learning to sing the song and improving on his vocal skills.
He is so gifted and I am so blessed to be his mama! There were many times of pushing him to practice when he didn't want to practice. The practice paid off and he did an excellent job at the state competition. So well that he scored very high! There was a bit of human blunder though and we were not informed of all the specific guidelines and at the competition there were some issues with the scoring. This resulted in another competitor being announced as the first place winner. Later in the evening we were told that without the scoring mishap, David technically had the highest score. We were then told that both David and the other competitor who received the 1st place trophy would be allowed to sing at the National competition in NC later this month. We went from very disappointed to very very excited! The other young competitor happens to be the daughter of some wonderful people with whom I have been delighted to have a budding friendship.
When we arrived home from the state competition, David & I were so very excited. Although he did not have the trophy, we knew that without the mishaps, he would have had the highest score. He was delighted! He also had won 1st place in the Bible Sword Drill category that he competed in.
Our disappointment came a few days later when, after I had already registered us online for the National Convention, Michael informed me that we were not going to be able to go. The cost was just too much for just David and me to travel that far and he was concerned about us traveling that distance alone. I was heart broken. I knew I had to respect his decision, but I cried many tears that night and the next morning as I prayed and tried to keep a right spirit toward my husband and God. After all, this was what David & I had worked so long and hard for. People can say that it's not about winning, that it's all about honoring God and sharpening your skills, building on experience for future things in life; but deep down we all just really want to win. We want the glory of saying "I'm #1!" Even me. I wanted to know in my heart that I helped my son reach that goal. Trying to keep this stuff balanced in my heart and mind can get really tough sometimes. I know the right things to say and how I'm supposed to act. I know what I need to teach my children, and that they will learn most by my example. Lots of praying is what it takes to keep me where I need to be!
I had a talk with David and explained to him why we could not go. He was understandably very upset. Because God had already been working in my heart about being submissive with my heart and my will, I could honestly tell David that this what was we had to do. I could, from my heart, tell him that it is best to honor Daddy and God and trust that they have our best interest in mind. We had discussions about why we sometimes have to surrender something that we so badly desire when there is nothing "wrong" with that particular desire. If we love and trust God completely, we can more easily let go of our desires and accept His perfect plan for us. I have learned in the last few weeks that my response to situations greatly impacts how my children respond. They are watching me and will mimic what they see in me. Oh, how I pray that I will respond wisely to life so they will do the same. I do not want to be cause for any further shortcomings and struggles in their lives. David cried a little and then we prayed. There have been several times lately where we have prayed together over specific situations. What a difference it makes in our attitudes! I don't hesitate to let my children hear me confessing my faults to God in prayer and voicing my struggles to the One who can help me.
I decided to wait a few days to cancel our registration with the National Convention in hopes that somehow Michael would change his mind or I might find a way to pay for the trip. Finally, on Monday, June13 I called the FWB office in Nashville and cancelled our registration and asked for a refund. The next day I received a confirmation email that our registration was cancelled. Emotions took a sudden turn that evening when I was informed that David & I could travel to NC for the National Competition in the church van with our youth pastor, and that the church would help pay for our hotel room. They were trying to help all of the families who had competitors going to Nationals. I believe we have 4 or 5 families going for the competition. After speaking to Michael, I was so excited that we were going to get to go after all! I let Michael be the one to tell David. On Wednesday I was able to call the office in Nashville again and get our registration back in order.
Fast forward about 9 days....we just returned home from a very exhausting week at church camp. Everyone is bone tired and teetering on the edge of cranky. All I really wanted was to get home, crawl in my bed and sleep. That was not to be. We stayed at the church longer than expected after unloading the van and loading my car. Then, just as we were getting ready to leave, I found an email on my phone. The email was from someone involved with the National Competition. It stated that there would have to be a decision made about the entry for David's vocal solo. They could only accept one entry. The person who told us they could send both children was mistaken. WOW!! How quickly these emotions can plunge!
I went back into the church and showed the email to our youth pastor and pastor. Much more discussion took place. At this point I'm really trying to keep from breaking down. Our wise pastor commented, "you all really need to go home and get some rest." LOL I did end up crying a little there in front of them. I got it together and went back out to my car....only to discover my car would not start. Dead battery. I'm not going to explain how that happened. Anyway, the tears came. LOL I'm laughing now, but I was not seeing any humor in the situation at that moment. We finally made it home and later that evening Michael said what I had feared he would say when hearing about the email.
He stated that if David didn't get to sing, we were not going to make the trip just for Bible Sword Drill. UGH!!! This was one crazy emotional roller coaster I was on. I did not want to say anything to David yet about the fact that he may not get to sing in NC. So.....I prayed. The next morning, Michael told me he had thought it through and no matter what decision was made about the vocal solo, we could go to Nationals for Bible Sword Drill. He did not want David to be hurt anymore. Now we were left waiting and wondering when the decision would be made and who would get to go. If the other competitor had been a stranger to us, it probably would have been easier. But knowing that the other competitor was a friend made this much more emotional. I was so concerned with how the other child would feel if David were allowed to sing at the Nationals.
I began to really feel that the right thing for us to do would be to step down. But I battled with whether or not I should do that to David. After all, what if they decided to let him sing. We would be giving up his opportunity to compete at the National competition. I had some talks with David. Michael & I talked with David. Michael and I didn't exactly see eye to eye on what to do. So.....I prayed and prayed. Trying to find out what God wanted us to do. By the time I was finally convinced about what we needed to do, I ended up not having to make that call. I found out that the decision was made to allow our friend's daughter to compete. I was relieved and very disappointed at the same time. I spoke to my friend this week and it's amazing how God works in our lives when we allow Him to. We both had been very concerned for the other's child. We had a wonderful visit over the phone and I know that this is just a little something that will be used to build our friendship.
Then came the final talk with David. This poor child has been through the emotional wringer as well in regards to this year's competition. He didn't win. He did win. He gets to go to NC. He doesn't get to go. He gets to go. He may not get to sing. He might get to sing. And now....sorry Sweety, you don't get to sing. I tried to get him back around to the point where he had been several days ago, where he was willing to step down. This was a struggle for him. As it obviously would be for most children and even most adults. I finally just told him the decision was not his to make and he would not be singing. I really don't know if he thinks I made the decision or if the youth board made the decision. Either way, he knows he is not singing at the national competition. We focused on the fact that he gets to do Bible Sword Drill and all the fun we will have on our trip. I told him that regardless of how we feel, as Christians, we need to obey God and we should always prefer others before ourselves(Phil.2). This is not how our society usually works, even within the church many times. I was pleased to see that after a few tears and angry words, we were able to pray and let go of the struggle. He was fine after that. I believe he will follow our example and respond to this as he sees us respond to it.
Through all of this, there have been so many teaching moments. I hope and pray that I caught all of them. I told David that when we go through difficult things we must be able to look back and have learned something. If we learn nothing from the trials we go through we are foolish and may very well face similar trials in the future until we learn what God wants us to learn. Much of what I feel I learned was not new to me, but rather just putting into action what I have known in my head. I feel like God was proving me through this. I hope I passed the test! I also hope that David will look back and see that God was working in his life as well. God is always working all around us. We just don't always see it.
He is only 10 years old and, Lord willing, will have many more opportunities to sing at competition. I can't wait for the trip. Although, honestly, 12 hours in the church van doesn't sound all that great! But I'm sure we will enjoy the fellowship with Ryan, Lindsey and Eleanor.
I am working hard at keeping everything here at home caught up and prepared ahead if possible. We will return home from the Nationals just 2 days before going to church camp again. I am going to be teaching a class at church camp so those lessons need to be prepared. We are planning to start school just 2 weeks after returning from church camp, so those lessons need to be in the computer. I feel like everything is just spinning so fast, and I am trying to hang on. Add to this mix my normal emotional ups and downs and trying to be good wife and mama...and whew! It's exhausting just to think about! LOL
I am so grateful that Nehemiah 8:10 tells us that "the joy of the Lord is our strength." I find my joy for life in Jesus. He is my Lord, my Savior, my Rock, my Shelter, my Everything. Because of Jesus I am blessed beyond measure and I can face anything as long as I am His.
Both of those are titles to songs that David has sung for competition. The first is the song he sang this year.
The second is the name of a wonderful song that My sister, Lisa and I sang when we were kids. David sang it last year at competition. It says...
He's still working on me, to make me what I ought to be. It took Him just a week to make the moon and the stars, the sun and Earth and Jupiter and Mars. How loving and patient He must be, He's still working on me.
There really ought to be a sign upon my heart...Don't judge him yet, there's an unfinished part. But I'll be perfect just according to His plan. Fashioned by the Master's loving hand.
In the mirror of His Word, reflections that I see make me wonder why He never gave up on me. But He loves me as I am, and helps me when I pray. Remember He's the potter, I'm the clay.
Sometimes things happen that really stink. Sometimes these "stinky" life happenings occur right in the middle of what starts out to be a really great time. We then struggle with how to respond. In years past, I rarely responded well to the difficult things in life. I have in the past been a very selfish, ugly, and angry person. I can look back and see those times, and I pray that I never go back to those ways.
There are times that in spite of what we really, really want, we need to surrender our desires and our will to accept what God has planned instead of what we have planned. As Christians we are expected to prefer others before ourselves. Thinking of others can be much easier said than done. But it can be done when we are completely surrendered to the Holy Spirit and the will of God. Thankfully God keeps working on us and someday He will complete the work that He has begun.
For the last several months, I have worked with David on a song for him to sing at the FWB MO State Youth Competition on June 5. I spent many many hours learning to play a song that was way out of my comfort zone of playing so he could compete. He spent much time learning to sing the song and improving on his vocal skills.
He is so gifted and I am so blessed to be his mama! There were many times of pushing him to practice when he didn't want to practice. The practice paid off and he did an excellent job at the state competition. So well that he scored very high! There was a bit of human blunder though and we were not informed of all the specific guidelines and at the competition there were some issues with the scoring. This resulted in another competitor being announced as the first place winner. Later in the evening we were told that without the scoring mishap, David technically had the highest score. We were then told that both David and the other competitor who received the 1st place trophy would be allowed to sing at the National competition in NC later this month. We went from very disappointed to very very excited! The other young competitor happens to be the daughter of some wonderful people with whom I have been delighted to have a budding friendship.
When we arrived home from the state competition, David & I were so very excited. Although he did not have the trophy, we knew that without the mishaps, he would have had the highest score. He was delighted! He also had won 1st place in the Bible Sword Drill category that he competed in.
Our disappointment came a few days later when, after I had already registered us online for the National Convention, Michael informed me that we were not going to be able to go. The cost was just too much for just David and me to travel that far and he was concerned about us traveling that distance alone. I was heart broken. I knew I had to respect his decision, but I cried many tears that night and the next morning as I prayed and tried to keep a right spirit toward my husband and God. After all, this was what David & I had worked so long and hard for. People can say that it's not about winning, that it's all about honoring God and sharpening your skills, building on experience for future things in life; but deep down we all just really want to win. We want the glory of saying "I'm #1!" Even me. I wanted to know in my heart that I helped my son reach that goal. Trying to keep this stuff balanced in my heart and mind can get really tough sometimes. I know the right things to say and how I'm supposed to act. I know what I need to teach my children, and that they will learn most by my example. Lots of praying is what it takes to keep me where I need to be!
I had a talk with David and explained to him why we could not go. He was understandably very upset. Because God had already been working in my heart about being submissive with my heart and my will, I could honestly tell David that this what was we had to do. I could, from my heart, tell him that it is best to honor Daddy and God and trust that they have our best interest in mind. We had discussions about why we sometimes have to surrender something that we so badly desire when there is nothing "wrong" with that particular desire. If we love and trust God completely, we can more easily let go of our desires and accept His perfect plan for us. I have learned in the last few weeks that my response to situations greatly impacts how my children respond. They are watching me and will mimic what they see in me. Oh, how I pray that I will respond wisely to life so they will do the same. I do not want to be cause for any further shortcomings and struggles in their lives. David cried a little and then we prayed. There have been several times lately where we have prayed together over specific situations. What a difference it makes in our attitudes! I don't hesitate to let my children hear me confessing my faults to God in prayer and voicing my struggles to the One who can help me.
I decided to wait a few days to cancel our registration with the National Convention in hopes that somehow Michael would change his mind or I might find a way to pay for the trip. Finally, on Monday, June13 I called the FWB office in Nashville and cancelled our registration and asked for a refund. The next day I received a confirmation email that our registration was cancelled. Emotions took a sudden turn that evening when I was informed that David & I could travel to NC for the National Competition in the church van with our youth pastor, and that the church would help pay for our hotel room. They were trying to help all of the families who had competitors going to Nationals. I believe we have 4 or 5 families going for the competition. After speaking to Michael, I was so excited that we were going to get to go after all! I let Michael be the one to tell David. On Wednesday I was able to call the office in Nashville again and get our registration back in order.
Fast forward about 9 days....we just returned home from a very exhausting week at church camp. Everyone is bone tired and teetering on the edge of cranky. All I really wanted was to get home, crawl in my bed and sleep. That was not to be. We stayed at the church longer than expected after unloading the van and loading my car. Then, just as we were getting ready to leave, I found an email on my phone. The email was from someone involved with the National Competition. It stated that there would have to be a decision made about the entry for David's vocal solo. They could only accept one entry. The person who told us they could send both children was mistaken. WOW!! How quickly these emotions can plunge!
I went back into the church and showed the email to our youth pastor and pastor. Much more discussion took place. At this point I'm really trying to keep from breaking down. Our wise pastor commented, "you all really need to go home and get some rest." LOL I did end up crying a little there in front of them. I got it together and went back out to my car....only to discover my car would not start. Dead battery. I'm not going to explain how that happened. Anyway, the tears came. LOL I'm laughing now, but I was not seeing any humor in the situation at that moment. We finally made it home and later that evening Michael said what I had feared he would say when hearing about the email.
He stated that if David didn't get to sing, we were not going to make the trip just for Bible Sword Drill. UGH!!! This was one crazy emotional roller coaster I was on. I did not want to say anything to David yet about the fact that he may not get to sing in NC. So.....I prayed. The next morning, Michael told me he had thought it through and no matter what decision was made about the vocal solo, we could go to Nationals for Bible Sword Drill. He did not want David to be hurt anymore. Now we were left waiting and wondering when the decision would be made and who would get to go. If the other competitor had been a stranger to us, it probably would have been easier. But knowing that the other competitor was a friend made this much more emotional. I was so concerned with how the other child would feel if David were allowed to sing at the Nationals.
I began to really feel that the right thing for us to do would be to step down. But I battled with whether or not I should do that to David. After all, what if they decided to let him sing. We would be giving up his opportunity to compete at the National competition. I had some talks with David. Michael & I talked with David. Michael and I didn't exactly see eye to eye on what to do. So.....I prayed and prayed. Trying to find out what God wanted us to do. By the time I was finally convinced about what we needed to do, I ended up not having to make that call. I found out that the decision was made to allow our friend's daughter to compete. I was relieved and very disappointed at the same time. I spoke to my friend this week and it's amazing how God works in our lives when we allow Him to. We both had been very concerned for the other's child. We had a wonderful visit over the phone and I know that this is just a little something that will be used to build our friendship.
Then came the final talk with David. This poor child has been through the emotional wringer as well in regards to this year's competition. He didn't win. He did win. He gets to go to NC. He doesn't get to go. He gets to go. He may not get to sing. He might get to sing. And now....sorry Sweety, you don't get to sing. I tried to get him back around to the point where he had been several days ago, where he was willing to step down. This was a struggle for him. As it obviously would be for most children and even most adults. I finally just told him the decision was not his to make and he would not be singing. I really don't know if he thinks I made the decision or if the youth board made the decision. Either way, he knows he is not singing at the national competition. We focused on the fact that he gets to do Bible Sword Drill and all the fun we will have on our trip. I told him that regardless of how we feel, as Christians, we need to obey God and we should always prefer others before ourselves(Phil.2). This is not how our society usually works, even within the church many times. I was pleased to see that after a few tears and angry words, we were able to pray and let go of the struggle. He was fine after that. I believe he will follow our example and respond to this as he sees us respond to it.
Through all of this, there have been so many teaching moments. I hope and pray that I caught all of them. I told David that when we go through difficult things we must be able to look back and have learned something. If we learn nothing from the trials we go through we are foolish and may very well face similar trials in the future until we learn what God wants us to learn. Much of what I feel I learned was not new to me, but rather just putting into action what I have known in my head. I feel like God was proving me through this. I hope I passed the test! I also hope that David will look back and see that God was working in his life as well. God is always working all around us. We just don't always see it.
He is only 10 years old and, Lord willing, will have many more opportunities to sing at competition. I can't wait for the trip. Although, honestly, 12 hours in the church van doesn't sound all that great! But I'm sure we will enjoy the fellowship with Ryan, Lindsey and Eleanor.
I am working hard at keeping everything here at home caught up and prepared ahead if possible. We will return home from the Nationals just 2 days before going to church camp again. I am going to be teaching a class at church camp so those lessons need to be prepared. We are planning to start school just 2 weeks after returning from church camp, so those lessons need to be in the computer. I feel like everything is just spinning so fast, and I am trying to hang on. Add to this mix my normal emotional ups and downs and trying to be good wife and mama...and whew! It's exhausting just to think about! LOL
I am so grateful that Nehemiah 8:10 tells us that "the joy of the Lord is our strength." I find my joy for life in Jesus. He is my Lord, my Savior, my Rock, my Shelter, my Everything. Because of Jesus I am blessed beyond measure and I can face anything as long as I am His.
Friday, June 17, 2011
Lessons from a Rose Bush
Recently I woke up early in the morning and decided to trim my one and only, precious rose bush. It's the only plant I've been able to keep alive.(Instead of a "green thumb", I've got a "black thumb"!) We planted this bush in front of our house about 3 years ago and it is flourishing. It is so very pretty and I try to take good care of it. As I was trimming it, I began to think about how my life is like that rose bush. I realize this thought is not an original thought to me....I've heard it mentioned over the years by others how our lives can be likened to various plants/trees. But.....as I was working and began thinking, I realized that even still, after so many years of being planted here in this life, God is still trimming and pruning my branches. My little bush is only 3 years old, and it produces SO many roses all over it. Last year it bloomed from late spring to late fall. It actually had unopened buds that froze when the temperature dropped to freezing in the late fall months. It just kept on blooming as long as it could.
I want to be like that rose bush. I want to bloom and bloom, and grow and grow. Yet, I only want to reach as far as God wants me to reach. I want to grow and bloom where God knows I'll be the best blessing I can be.
My rose bush is planted just outside my dining room windows. It's grown so tall I can see it with no problem when I look out my windows. I'm even having to trim it back a little because it is reaching out into areas I don't want it to reach. So, I wonder....Are there times in my life that as I'm growing and blooming, I may start reaching out into areas that God doesn't want me to be? I believe I've experienced that in my life and God had to trim me back a little. Sometimes we may be doing just what God called us to do, and we may be growing and blooming, experiencing God's blessings in our lives, and then all of a sudden, things change. Life changes. Many times, this appears to be something bad happening to us. Maybe even unfair and undeserved in our eyes. But if we allow ourselves to be pruned and trimmed and cared for by our Father God in those times, we will look back and see that He is doing what is necessary either for our growth or for His purpose in a greater plan that we do not understand yet.
My precious rose bush has the prettiest pink blossoms. I love to see the roses at every stage.
The buds, wrapped up so neatly and tightly, so delicately, are just waiting to pop open. You can not see these from far away, yet there are so many on my bush I can hardly count all of them. I've noticed in trimming, that many times these buds are hidden from sight by the blossoms that are already in full bloom. These are the big full pink flowers that are so visible from a distance. These blossoms are so many and so full that they are often touching each other, overlapping each other. These are not a permanent fixture on my rose bush. They are there only for a time. They open, they serve their purpose and then....they begin to fade.
I see this as the many things that fill my life. Not material things, but activities, duties, friendships, jobs, etc. God has allowed me to experience many of these things in my life. I've never traveled the world or achieved lofty goals worthy of great acclaim, but my life has been and is very fulfilling to me. There have been many changes in my life over the years. Some changes have been abrupt and difficult while others have been rather gradual and easier to accept. Some changes happen so subtly, they seem to take me by surprise when I finally notice them, but then I realize one day that it has happened and when I look closely, I see that it's been that way for a while. I can look back and see that there have been definite times in my life when God has done some pruning in my life. Some of those times have been rather painful at the moment of trimming, but I can see from this side that I experienced much growth because of it. I can look back and see that there were times I was doing just what God had planted me to do, but when the branches reached a place He didn't want me to be, He had to trim and take those things out of my life. This could be for my own sake or the sake of others. Only He knows. I choose to love my God and trust Him to make my life what He wants it to be. I pray that the blossoms in my life will be as pleasant to those around me as my rose bush is to me. I pray that as I live each day, my words and my actions will bring out a sweet aroma to bless those who know me. This is my desire.
A very important thing I noted while trimming, was that as the blossoms faded and the petals fell, it left an empty stem that needed to be trimmed off. These will, in time, dry up and break off easily, but it is healthy for the bush if I trim these off right away. In this process, I noticed that there were many flowers that I looked at and thought "Those still look pretty good." Yet, as I began to work with the bush, I would bump those flowers that at first glance looked good, and the petals would begin to fall so easily. I began to just gently shake the branches of the bush. Those petals that were weak and spent, and ready to fall, would do just that. They were not strong at all. How many times in my life, does God gently "shake" things up a bit to find out where I need to be trimmed? As the petals fell, I would sometimes keep shaking and other times just gently pull off several petals at a time to expose the stem that needed trimmed off.
This trimming of my rose bush took much longer than I originally thought. The more I trimmed, the more I found that needed trimming. Sometimes I would see a cluster of roses that still looked so pretty, but when shaken, they would begin to fall. As the weak, dying petals fell, it would either expose several other stems in need of trimming or, in many cases, brand new buds that were hidden from sight. It was then that I thought, "How many times have I been upset because God took away something that I thought was still "pretty" and after surrendering to Him, realized that He just exposed new buds waiting to open in my life?" How many other times has God removed dead "petals" from my life and exposed even more dead stems that needed to be removed so I could continue to grow and blossom for Him?
I am so grateful that God is patient and keeps caring for me. I hope and pray that you, too, will desire to grow and bloom for God. Allow Him to trim and prune when needed. Trust Him with your life. There is no greater joy in life than to belong to Jesus, and to feel His peace and joy.
I look forward to many more lessons like this one. The Holy Spirit is a great Teacher! :) I just wish he didn't start class so early in the morning! ;) LOL It seems that my most memorable times of personal worship and hearing from God have been early in the morning. I guess that's why the Bible says in Proverbs 8:17 "...those that seek me early shall find me."
The LORD is faithful! I pray you find Him so in your life.
I want to be like that rose bush. I want to bloom and bloom, and grow and grow. Yet, I only want to reach as far as God wants me to reach. I want to grow and bloom where God knows I'll be the best blessing I can be.
My rose bush is planted just outside my dining room windows. It's grown so tall I can see it with no problem when I look out my windows. I'm even having to trim it back a little because it is reaching out into areas I don't want it to reach. So, I wonder....Are there times in my life that as I'm growing and blooming, I may start reaching out into areas that God doesn't want me to be? I believe I've experienced that in my life and God had to trim me back a little. Sometimes we may be doing just what God called us to do, and we may be growing and blooming, experiencing God's blessings in our lives, and then all of a sudden, things change. Life changes. Many times, this appears to be something bad happening to us. Maybe even unfair and undeserved in our eyes. But if we allow ourselves to be pruned and trimmed and cared for by our Father God in those times, we will look back and see that He is doing what is necessary either for our growth or for His purpose in a greater plan that we do not understand yet.
My precious rose bush has the prettiest pink blossoms. I love to see the roses at every stage.
The buds, wrapped up so neatly and tightly, so delicately, are just waiting to pop open. You can not see these from far away, yet there are so many on my bush I can hardly count all of them. I've noticed in trimming, that many times these buds are hidden from sight by the blossoms that are already in full bloom. These are the big full pink flowers that are so visible from a distance. These blossoms are so many and so full that they are often touching each other, overlapping each other. These are not a permanent fixture on my rose bush. They are there only for a time. They open, they serve their purpose and then....they begin to fade.
I see this as the many things that fill my life. Not material things, but activities, duties, friendships, jobs, etc. God has allowed me to experience many of these things in my life. I've never traveled the world or achieved lofty goals worthy of great acclaim, but my life has been and is very fulfilling to me. There have been many changes in my life over the years. Some changes have been abrupt and difficult while others have been rather gradual and easier to accept. Some changes happen so subtly, they seem to take me by surprise when I finally notice them, but then I realize one day that it has happened and when I look closely, I see that it's been that way for a while. I can look back and see that there have been definite times in my life when God has done some pruning in my life. Some of those times have been rather painful at the moment of trimming, but I can see from this side that I experienced much growth because of it. I can look back and see that there were times I was doing just what God had planted me to do, but when the branches reached a place He didn't want me to be, He had to trim and take those things out of my life. This could be for my own sake or the sake of others. Only He knows. I choose to love my God and trust Him to make my life what He wants it to be. I pray that the blossoms in my life will be as pleasant to those around me as my rose bush is to me. I pray that as I live each day, my words and my actions will bring out a sweet aroma to bless those who know me. This is my desire.
A very important thing I noted while trimming, was that as the blossoms faded and the petals fell, it left an empty stem that needed to be trimmed off. These will, in time, dry up and break off easily, but it is healthy for the bush if I trim these off right away. In this process, I noticed that there were many flowers that I looked at and thought "Those still look pretty good." Yet, as I began to work with the bush, I would bump those flowers that at first glance looked good, and the petals would begin to fall so easily. I began to just gently shake the branches of the bush. Those petals that were weak and spent, and ready to fall, would do just that. They were not strong at all. How many times in my life, does God gently "shake" things up a bit to find out where I need to be trimmed? As the petals fell, I would sometimes keep shaking and other times just gently pull off several petals at a time to expose the stem that needed trimmed off.
This trimming of my rose bush took much longer than I originally thought. The more I trimmed, the more I found that needed trimming. Sometimes I would see a cluster of roses that still looked so pretty, but when shaken, they would begin to fall. As the weak, dying petals fell, it would either expose several other stems in need of trimming or, in many cases, brand new buds that were hidden from sight. It was then that I thought, "How many times have I been upset because God took away something that I thought was still "pretty" and after surrendering to Him, realized that He just exposed new buds waiting to open in my life?" How many other times has God removed dead "petals" from my life and exposed even more dead stems that needed to be removed so I could continue to grow and blossom for Him?
I am so grateful that God is patient and keeps caring for me. I hope and pray that you, too, will desire to grow and bloom for God. Allow Him to trim and prune when needed. Trust Him with your life. There is no greater joy in life than to belong to Jesus, and to feel His peace and joy.
I look forward to many more lessons like this one. The Holy Spirit is a great Teacher! :) I just wish he didn't start class so early in the morning! ;) LOL It seems that my most memorable times of personal worship and hearing from God have been early in the morning. I guess that's why the Bible says in Proverbs 8:17 "...those that seek me early shall find me."
The LORD is faithful! I pray you find Him so in your life.
Friday, June 10, 2011
Marking Time
I can't believe we are already 10 days into June. Seems like just yesterday I was posting about our vacation. Not only has the past month just flown by, but the last 10 years. Michael and I were recently discussing how fast the years are passing, and I commented that maybe it was because with the kids, the years are chopped up into such small segments. We are always marking time from one game to the next, one holiday to the next, etc. For the kids, time may seem to creep by, but for us it seems to be whizzing by like a jet plane!
May was a busy month. Alahna graduated from Kindergarten. It was a very brief, yet sweet evening shared with friends from ARCHE. Michael and I presented her with her diploma in front of our parents and several other homeschool families. She looked so cute in her cap and gown!
Between our vacation and Alahna's graduation we celebrated Mother's Day and Mom's birthday. We enjoyed a fun afternoon at Crystal City park. Our family games of volleyball have quickly become a favorite! (We've only played twice!) LOL
The week following Alahna's graduation, David took the Stanford Achievement Test for the first time. He seemed to do well, but we have not yet received the results. We are not required to have this testing done, but chose to for various reasons. We thought it would be good experience for him.
I got to spend two different days with Dad while taking him to doctor appointments. That was a pleasant time that doesn't happen often. We had lunch together and I enjoyed hearing a few stories from when he was younger.
We then ended the month with my Mom & siblings at West City Park on Memorial Day. It was a very long, but fun filled day. It was quite warm, but the little ones cooled off with the water pump! We played softball this time. I only got to play for a little bit before needing to go check on our pavilion and food. But the "boys"(my brothers,hubby, & brothers-in-law) and Carla and Ronni played for quite a while.
Karin(my step-sister) and her family joined us for the first time in several years. Her husband had not yet met most of our family. It was great to have them there. I am sure that Warren would be so pleased to see them together with all of us.
In the midst of all of this busy activity for the month, we were trying to finish our school year. We are still working on that! David was preparing for the State Youth Competition, so we spent much time practicing his song and working on his Bible Sword Drill. I'll tell more about that in the next post.
I must go for now. There are things to be done and I am planning to take a few hours to myself this evening while Michael keeps the kiddos! I think I'll go to the mall and get some good smellies at Bath & Body Works! Then maybe some cinnamon pretzel bites with icing!!! MMM!!
May was a busy month. Alahna graduated from Kindergarten. It was a very brief, yet sweet evening shared with friends from ARCHE. Michael and I presented her with her diploma in front of our parents and several other homeschool families. She looked so cute in her cap and gown!
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| WOW! They all look so happy! LOL |
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| Mom - the Birthday girl! |
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| Me & Jesse |
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| Jason and Chloe |
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| David |
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| Warren, Kynzie, Alahna, Tyler, Kylie |
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| Ronni |
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| Alahna & Chloe |
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| Justin, Josh & my kids |
The week following Alahna's graduation, David took the Stanford Achievement Test for the first time. He seemed to do well, but we have not yet received the results. We are not required to have this testing done, but chose to for various reasons. We thought it would be good experience for him.
I got to spend two different days with Dad while taking him to doctor appointments. That was a pleasant time that doesn't happen often. We had lunch together and I enjoyed hearing a few stories from when he was younger.
We then ended the month with my Mom & siblings at West City Park on Memorial Day. It was a very long, but fun filled day. It was quite warm, but the little ones cooled off with the water pump! We played softball this time. I only got to play for a little bit before needing to go check on our pavilion and food. But the "boys"(my brothers,hubby, & brothers-in-law) and Carla and Ronni played for quite a while.
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| Peyton, Harrison, Tyler, Alahna, David |
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| Peyton, Harrison, Tyler, Alahna, Kynzie, Warren, David |
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| Chef Michael |
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| The water was SO cold! |
In the midst of all of this busy activity for the month, we were trying to finish our school year. We are still working on that! David was preparing for the State Youth Competition, so we spent much time practicing his song and working on his Bible Sword Drill. I'll tell more about that in the next post.
I must go for now. There are things to be done and I am planning to take a few hours to myself this evening while Michael keeps the kiddos! I think I'll go to the mall and get some good smellies at Bath & Body Works! Then maybe some cinnamon pretzel bites with icing!!! MMM!!
Saturday, May 14, 2011
Vacation to Remember!
For the last several years, we have taken our family vacation in Branson at Silver Dollar City. We love spending a few days there. The atmosphere is so family friendly and since we usually go at the end of April, the weather is pretty good. We like taking our family vacations in the late spring to avoid the summer crowds.
The kids & I have been wanting to go to the ocean for the last couple years. Michael does not like swimming or getting wet too much so he really had no desire to spend much time at the ocean. He loves the view and the sights/sounds of nature, but not the swimming part. He was concerned that the kids would get bored too quickly without the constant busyness of an amusement park. But....he really wanted the kids and me to get to see the ocean while we knew we could, so here we are!
Day 1 - (Sat): We left home a little before 4am on Saturday. We arrived at our rented condo in Pensacola Beach, FL at 5pm. The trip down went surprisingly quick. David & Alahna were incredibly well behaved. We saw several areas in southern MO and Northern MS that were flooded. As we drove further south through MS we saw several areas of tree damage that appeared to be from the many severe thunderstorms/tornadoes that have hit in recent weeks. Thanks to books, drawing pads and the wonder of technology, we did not hear the age-old -every 20 minutes -trip questions of "Are we there yet?" or "How much longer til we get there?" I think Alahna asked a couple times if we were almost there. Instead we were entertained by Alahna singing with her mp3 player. She played a song by Christian band Mercy Me about 6 times and sang with it so passionately! LOL She was really getting into it.
Meanwhile, David was playing with his new iPod Touch that he just bought with his Christmas and birthday money. He was able to take pictures along the way, listen to his own music and play games! He also spent some time drawing.
After we arrived at the condo and unloaded the car, we took the kids across the road to the beach. Watching their excitement at seeing the ocean was one of my favorite moments of the whole trip. Here is one of my favorite pics:
We told the kids they had to wait til the next day to get in the water...well, it didn't quite work out that way. They were thorougly soaked by the time we walked back.
Day 2 (Sun): First thing after breakfast we went to Walmart for some groceries and miscellaneous items. We had to get extra dollar bills b/c we had to cross a partial toll bridge in order to get to Walmart and an area with more restaurants. It cost $1 each time we went back to the peninsula where our condo was. :) I think we went to Walmart at least 3 times during the week! LOL The rest of the day was spent at the pool and the beach. We did use sunscreen, but didn't reapply b/c of the sand at the beach....and well, we paid for it! Poor Michael suffered the most. David looked the worst because of the white patches on his face where the goggles were! LOL Alahna wasn't burned as bad as they were, but she whined more! :) We went through over half a bottle of After Sun Aloe gel throughout the week.
At some point during the week I made everyone line up so I could spray their sunburns with vinegar. It stinks like crazy but definitely helps cool the sunburn. Let me tell you, there is nothing on earth funnier than watching your husband gag while you are spraying vinegar on his sunburn! I laughed so hard! Poor Michael had a towel to cover his mouth and nose and he still gagged and choked from the smell and nearly jumped out of his skin from the cold spray on his burned skin. Alahna cried and threw a fit til Michael had to hold her still while I sprayed her back. She has issues with vinegar b/c I've made her taste it before for being unkind with her words. I promised her she wouldn't taste it, that it just had to go on her back, but she still screamed. David handled it pretty well, and I sprayed my sunburn as well.
Here's a really funny pic from Sunday.....It was so windy that David's blue swim ring blew away. He had to chase it so far up the beach! It just kept rolling and rolling. It finally rolled up and over the sand dune. I'm not sure if you can see the blue ring up in the grass, but that's what he is chasing! Michael and I could hardly stop laughing. Michael said it would slow down and start to wobble like it would fall and then the wind would catch it again and send it rolling away faster.
Day 3 (Mon): Michael spent a good portion of Monday sleeping. He was so uncomfortable and just physically drained. The kids and I did go to the pool for a little while, and we went to the beach in the early evening just for a walk and to search for sea shell treasures.
Day 4 (Tue): We rushed around to try to get to the Pensacola Naval Air Station in time for the 8:30am Blue Angels practice show. We were told this was great and that there was a free museum on the base a well. So our plans were to watch the air show and visit the museum , then go back to the condo. Well, we were running late (as always!) and after sitting in line to get onto the base we were concerned we would miss the show. Turns out it was some sort of week long Aviation celebration and there were air shows and coastguard demonstrations from 8:30am - 1:00pm!!!! This would explain the crowds that began showing up, and the soldiers selling water and soda! We saw the Blue Angels practice show as well as a Harrier demonstration, some coast guard rescue demonstrations, and a vintage aircraft flyover! Needless to say, we were in the sun much longer than anticipated! I did have the sunscreen with us and we did use it, but we got more burned than we already were! Our necks were burned because we spent so much time looking up in the sky at the aircraft.
After the air show and museum we stopped for dinner at Whataburger and collapsed back at the condo. We didn't bother going to the beach that day. I must say, the burger at Whataburger was good....but their chicken rated right up there with Chik-fil-A!! It was YUMMY!
Day 5 (Wed): This was a much cooler morning. We took an early morning stroll on the beach and found much more treasure. Here are a few pics from Wednesday:
This was the day we tried to build sand castles!
We didn't do too well, but it was fun trying!
Day 6 (Thu): Much more time spent just playing in the sand, watching the water and enjoying our time together. We rented a movie for the evening and had a family movie night. We watched the new Yogi Bear movie. It was so funny!
David & Alahna loved burying themselves in the sand.
This was such a memorable trip. It was such a blessing to enjoy our time together the way we did. No rushing around except for one morning. No set schedules for anything. Michael was surprised at how much he enjoyed the down time. I think it was good for all of us. David and Alahna played so well together all week. They actually play pretty well together at home most of the time.
The kids & I have been wanting to go to the ocean for the last couple years. Michael does not like swimming or getting wet too much so he really had no desire to spend much time at the ocean. He loves the view and the sights/sounds of nature, but not the swimming part. He was concerned that the kids would get bored too quickly without the constant busyness of an amusement park. But....he really wanted the kids and me to get to see the ocean while we knew we could, so here we are!
Day 1 - (Sat): We left home a little before 4am on Saturday. We arrived at our rented condo in Pensacola Beach, FL at 5pm. The trip down went surprisingly quick. David & Alahna were incredibly well behaved. We saw several areas in southern MO and Northern MS that were flooded. As we drove further south through MS we saw several areas of tree damage that appeared to be from the many severe thunderstorms/tornadoes that have hit in recent weeks. Thanks to books, drawing pads and the wonder of technology, we did not hear the age-old -every 20 minutes -trip questions of "Are we there yet?" or "How much longer til we get there?" I think Alahna asked a couple times if we were almost there. Instead we were entertained by Alahna singing with her mp3 player. She played a song by Christian band Mercy Me about 6 times and sang with it so passionately! LOL She was really getting into it.
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| Here she was reading a poetry book and listening to her music. |
After we arrived at the condo and unloaded the car, we took the kids across the road to the beach. Watching their excitement at seeing the ocean was one of my favorite moments of the whole trip. Here is one of my favorite pics:
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| We made it! |
Day 2 (Sun): First thing after breakfast we went to Walmart for some groceries and miscellaneous items. We had to get extra dollar bills b/c we had to cross a partial toll bridge in order to get to Walmart and an area with more restaurants. It cost $1 each time we went back to the peninsula where our condo was. :) I think we went to Walmart at least 3 times during the week! LOL The rest of the day was spent at the pool and the beach. We did use sunscreen, but didn't reapply b/c of the sand at the beach....and well, we paid for it! Poor Michael suffered the most. David looked the worst because of the white patches on his face where the goggles were! LOL Alahna wasn't burned as bad as they were, but she whined more! :) We went through over half a bottle of After Sun Aloe gel throughout the week.
At some point during the week I made everyone line up so I could spray their sunburns with vinegar. It stinks like crazy but definitely helps cool the sunburn. Let me tell you, there is nothing on earth funnier than watching your husband gag while you are spraying vinegar on his sunburn! I laughed so hard! Poor Michael had a towel to cover his mouth and nose and he still gagged and choked from the smell and nearly jumped out of his skin from the cold spray on his burned skin. Alahna cried and threw a fit til Michael had to hold her still while I sprayed her back. She has issues with vinegar b/c I've made her taste it before for being unkind with her words. I promised her she wouldn't taste it, that it just had to go on her back, but she still screamed. David handled it pretty well, and I sprayed my sunburn as well.
Here's a really funny pic from Sunday.....It was so windy that David's blue swim ring blew away. He had to chase it so far up the beach! It just kept rolling and rolling. It finally rolled up and over the sand dune. I'm not sure if you can see the blue ring up in the grass, but that's what he is chasing! Michael and I could hardly stop laughing. Michael said it would slow down and start to wobble like it would fall and then the wind would catch it again and send it rolling away faster.
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| David chasing his swim ring |
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| Such fun! |
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| Here comes a wave! |
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| Buried Treasure! |
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| More Buried Treasure!! |
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| Ouch! |
Day 4 (Tue): We rushed around to try to get to the Pensacola Naval Air Station in time for the 8:30am Blue Angels practice show. We were told this was great and that there was a free museum on the base a well. So our plans were to watch the air show and visit the museum , then go back to the condo. Well, we were running late (as always!) and after sitting in line to get onto the base we were concerned we would miss the show. Turns out it was some sort of week long Aviation celebration and there were air shows and coastguard demonstrations from 8:30am - 1:00pm!!!! This would explain the crowds that began showing up, and the soldiers selling water and soda! We saw the Blue Angels practice show as well as a Harrier demonstration, some coast guard rescue demonstrations, and a vintage aircraft flyover! Needless to say, we were in the sun much longer than anticipated! I did have the sunscreen with us and we did use it, but we got more burned than we already were! Our necks were burned because we spent so much time looking up in the sky at the aircraft.
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| Michael showing Alahna where to look. David taking pics! |
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| Sleepy girl...tired of waiting. |
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| Thankful for technology! He got tired of waiting too. |
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| The Blue Angels were so worth the wait! |
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| They were amazing! |
Day 5 (Wed): This was a much cooler morning. We took an early morning stroll on the beach and found much more treasure. Here are a few pics from Wednesday:
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| Looking for sea shells |
We didn't do too well, but it was fun trying!
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| We did use a beach umbrella one day. We were in need of the shade. |
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| Cleaned up and ready for dinner. |
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| Little Beach Princess |
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| I loved their water tower! |
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| Interesting house we saw while out for a drive |
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| Look at the small trees by driveway! Too funny! |
Day 6 (Thu): Much more time spent just playing in the sand, watching the water and enjoying our time together. We rented a movie for the evening and had a family movie night. We watched the new Yogi Bear movie. It was so funny!
Day 7 (Fri): This was probably one of the best days! All week it had been so windy and the waves were pretty active in the Gulf. The warning flag system they use at the beach was flying a yellow flag all week, which meant use caution when swimming. There was a chance for rip currents possible, so we kept the kids pretty close while in the water all week. We didn't go out very far on the Gulf side until Friday. The flag was green, which meant it was safe for swimming, and the water was so calm and so much fun! We went out much further. We were out over waist deep and could still see our feet the water was so clear. This was also the day we got to see dolphins! (well, their fins! LOL) I had been hoping all week for a sighting of dolphins. A couple times I thought I saw movement way out in the distance, but it was so quick I couldn't be sure. On Friday while we were at the beach we saw about 4 dolphin fins going past, quite a ways out from where we were, but much closer than we had seen before. From what I read about the difference between shark and dolphin fins, I'm pretty sure they were dolphins! :) Let's hope so anyway!
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| our dolphin sighting |
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| my Sweety & me |
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| David |
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| Add caption |
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| Alahna |
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| Life's greatest treasure.....My Family! |
This was such a memorable trip. It was such a blessing to enjoy our time together the way we did. No rushing around except for one morning. No set schedules for anything. Michael was surprised at how much he enjoyed the down time. I think it was good for all of us. David and Alahna played so well together all week. They actually play pretty well together at home most of the time.
One of the best parts.....I was able to do laundry while there and came home with suitcases full of CLEAN laundry! I was loving that!
We don't know what tomorrow will bring, so we will enjoy today and cherish each moment we have together.
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